Singlehood is a unique time and season in one’s  life, I always like to live every phase of my life to its fullest, so don’t miss out at the phase for it comes only once, this is simply the stage where the  man  or the woman is not married, this phase served as the preparatory stage of what will either turn to a blissful marriage or not.

To be a single that is being sought after you need to have the necessary qualities, the single person must start now to get necessary information regarding what he or she is intending to go into, below are some useful trait they must possesses:

  • SET STANDARD: You must set standard for yourself, you must not be the anyone type, you must know what you want, the person you will be comfortable with,  you don’t enter relationship by pity, you must be proud of the person and walk with him/her comfortabl, by walk I mean the marriage phase , you must have a dream destination.
  • UNDERSTANDING: This is a vital tool in relationship, I will say here that if you don’t know your fiancée/fiance very well please do not proceed to marriage, the effect is too great as you may wonder the kind of person your spouse  has turned into, poor understanding is the reason you will hear a man/woman  say my partner has assume another character, he/she has change, this implies that you did not know each other  well, the period of relationship is a time to study each other to know each other strength and weakness, when you have known these, you build on the strength and correct the weakness with the strength, avoid using your partner weakness to insult him/her, try and cover up so that the weakness will not be visible to the outside world. You can understand your partner so well that you can communicate through body language, this should be your target.
  • PRAYER:This is very important as this will lay a solid foundation, “in anything you are doing add a little prayer” the spiritual life of your partner should be of concern to you as the deeper your partner is in Godly matter the stronger your relationship and the envisaged marriage. I will say here if there are visible differences,both need to draw up plan on how to handle each other weaknesses and you will see how God will engrace you instead of murmur or querying God.


    • In marriage the family should  be covered spiritually, the children need spiritual covering too..
    • The exponential blessing accompany with marriage to be seen in your home.
    • The destinies of your children not to be erased,every born child have a star(s) to their record these stars must not be replace,or reduced,there was a scenario where a child was born , some evil persons came and was foretelling the destiny of that child,it was a bright future,but this child died before the night set in,believe it or not evil exist, but we have a kingdoms were if you belong you are not within their reach.
    • The marriage plans and preparation must be put into God’s hand; it can also be coupled with fasting.
    • The role of your pastor in this prayer can not be neglected, can you imagine if Jesus was not invited to the wedding at Canaan the shame and disgrace it would have brought to those couples, the presence of Jesus in your plans and home will erase disgrace.


The choice of the partner you would like to spend the rest of your life with must not be hasty or done unprepared,a careful desire will give birth to a rightful answer, please don’t base your sole criteria on the physical appearance they fade with time,below are my two ways for searching for a life partner:
** As sons and daughters of God, we must be able to listen to our spirit man when he is talking to us, God drop messages for us to our sprit man which is interpreted by our mind and then transfer to the body for utilization, so let your spirit man be quiet in order to hear from God 1Peter 3:4 …quiet spirit…. John 10:27 My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me.
** Prayer: This is one way God communicate to His children, He made His plan and purpose to us in prayer, we must be sensitive to hear from Him, prayer is a two way thing, when you pray you must wait for response, no matter how long the response take don’t take a hasty decision 2Cronicles 7:14 If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, He is a rewarder of them that diligently seek Him, Hebrews 11:6 He will reward you with a successful and blessed home
Do not base your search on physical things, tribe, material things, traditions, the only person that knows you in and out is your creator and through effective prayer His will be manifested in your life.
After the prayer, appropriate steps should be taken to start the familiarization and relationship process, and always keep God abreast of the whole stages for guidance.


Many persons have made mistake using fleece as their true way of knowing their life partner, although it make work for some but its not a sure way. Fleece is not a sure/reliable way to search for a life partner , one may ask what is fleece, it is anything or sign used to confirmed whether a particular person is the Mr./Miss right among the persons I have, why must you have two, three men and so on as a lady, why not just your man, and now you want to use elimination method to know the right person, the realm of fleece is too shallow, it can be influence wrongly by the evil ones, you hear them say the one that call me first today or on my birthday, the one to mention a particular word, who can guess my middle name correctly and so on, these persons have scriptural backing from the bible citing Eliezer and Gideon cases, I will say here that those signs worked because that was the only way God could communicate with them since the Holy Spirit has not come then, but now we have a more sure witness dwelling in us the person of the Holy Spirit, why use fleece, remember the Spirit searches the deep things and deposit them in our spirit man as you can see in 1 Corinthians 2:10, But God hath revealed them unto us by his Spirit: for the Spirit searcheth all things, yea, the deep things of God. The post resurrection church has the Holy Spirit dwelling in the believers, the spirit of truth as said by Jesus in John 16:13, “the Spirit of truth…. That reveal God divine plan and purpose to us, this sure way is to listen to the voice of God through this Spirit and the right message will be communicated to you.

This is the phase were the intending couples really set out for business,this is were they tend to study each other very well,pray and envisage a colourful marriage,this stage serve as a dress rehearsal for the life long commitment they are entering,below is the X-ray meaning of courtship:

C    COMMUNICATION: This is very important, communicate, talk, converse, interact, it makes you two know each other well.
O   OPENNESS: Leave no secret behind that need to be shared,It must be talked about.
U   UNDERSTANDING: This play a pivotal role in determining how the marriage will last, love is important but it does not determine the time frame of marriage, a full understanding must be attained before heading to the altar.
R   RELATIONSHIP: This is the environment that is set up for the interaction to be successful, if both can’t relate well at this stage marriage may not solve it, this goes a long way to prove if both parties are compatible. It creates the enabling environment for effective communication.
T    TESTING: Test each other to know how and when to complement each other.
S    SUBMISSION: This is where the learning starts that will continue in marriage, any man you as a lady can’t submit to now, don’t expect a any magic in marriage.
H   HOPE: These are the things you are hoping to see in marriage, expect the best ,marriage is not a necessary evil, that was what they hope for and they got it, so don’t base yours on baseless philosophy.
I    INTRODUCTION: This form part of the courtship phase,tthe familiarization with both parents.

P   PLANNING: This is the step by step methods of how to actualize your goals, without this your goals will be static.
When these meaning is adhered to, then you have bought a ticket for a blissful marriage flight.

If you are passing through any challenge or difficulty and you need to talk to someone,please drop your comment below as we will be ready to give you professional advice. Singlehood is a very interesting stage in ones life, please don’t live this phase ignorantly, don’t die in silence.